Mixed Feelings...

I know my posts are usually really positive and upbeat-Or at least I hope they are!!!  BUT I've been feeling a bit down the past few days. I must say that I woke up this morning and I just felt a real peace. Things arent going perfectly right now...but I just felt ok about it all.

#1 I hadnt heard from Shane for a few days and the kids hadnt talked to him since Saturday. I know Shane is doing what he can, but I must admit that I feel a little stranded in the "parenting" role at the moment. Mostly frustrated I guess. The kids have realized that Daddy isnt here and they are really testing the boundaries that is for sure. I got home from Bible study yesterday and saw that he had tried to call on Skype. He did end up calling this morning. The kids were so happy to see him and wanted to know when he was coming home and if he was bringing them a present!!! So...That is a real answer to prayer that we have heard from him. He is having a great time and said that he is talking to a lot of people about a lot of things. That is really all he can say I guess because of the security situation.

#2 Maggie is still going really well. On Monday night, she started getting sick after her feeds. I thought it was something I ate that was bothering her...but I'm still not sure. I went to lay her down in bed and she had the biggest chuck I have seen...really thick/mucus like stuff. So, I just could not lay her back on her tummy. I have always slept the kids on their backs because of SIDS, but I know that she would have choked if she would have gotten sick on her back. So from now on-She is on her tummy. I am having trouble sleeping though and just keep checking on her through the night. She is doing good...but is a bit congested so she is waking up a little earlier (5:30 or so)! She is still getting a little sick, but doesnt seem to be bothered by it all. Praise the Lord

#3 Dave is pretty well toilet trained now (I think)! He has really been testing us in this though and it has been a little frustrating. I guess with Shane being gone and all the change it has affected him a bit. He is still in undies though and more often than not he does well. I have been staying up till 10 to take him to the toilet before I go to bed. Once he goes, he is fine to sleep in undies at night. I guess it is just making me tired staying up so late. The boys are having their good moments and their bad ones. I am sure I will one day look back on it and have a good laugh!!!! Thank you Lord for the good moments---at least their are a few!!!

#4 I really do have a positive attitude towards raising support. I have been so thankful for that this time around! I remember telling Shane at one point a few years ago that I would never raise support again....but here we are and I am enjoying it. Yesterday, we got our montly update and I was a bit bummed to see that we have only increased our support level to 8%. So many people have said that they would support us...but they have yet to send their forms in. I guess people just have no idea what it is like. It all started getting on top of me last night...I was just letting things get me down. I kept thinking that Shane was overseas preparing and seeking clarity on what the Lord would have us do....and then "feeling" as if we just are never going to get the support to go. When I woke up this morning, I immediately starting thinking about Moses and the people of Israel. We are reading through Exodus at the moment (we are reading the Bible chronologically this year) and it was just brought to my mind about when they left Egypt and came to the Red Sea...I'm sure Moses didnt feel so great when the people wanted return to Egypt and give up. Instead of trusting, they were just complaining against him and God. I hope that makes sense...I think the Lord was just reminding me that I need to trust and that He is the only one who can gather our support team together in his timing.

#5 I was really sad on Saturday after finding out that my sister didnt get a job that she interviewed for. I have had my friends praying for the past few days about another interview that she had yesterday. AND SHE GOT IT!!! So happy....the Lord really worked it out for her and it is the perfect situation.

Please continue to pray for us all over the next week or so. It is nice to see that things can get a little stressful and that I can actually see how the Lord is answering my prayers and speaking to me about my attitude and thoughts. I feel like I am really learning how to find the positive in the midst of what seems like all negative. Things may not be going the exact way I would like them too...but it is nothing to complain about-I must trust Him and He will be faithful.